I Am Kind Regardless of Differences
(Affirmation: I Am Kind Regardless of Differences)
Why is it so important to be kind?
In my book, “Raising Super ‘C’ Kids,” I wrote, “If you want the world to be a better place, compassion accomplishes that. As you teach your kids compassion, you bring more love and light into the world.”
Compassion is the feeling behind kindness. As we are kind to one another, we create a place of love, respect and connection. We show others that we are willing to accept them for who they are. What’s more, the acts of kindness that we do help us to find a greater sense of purpose and joy in our lives.
I feel that the affirmation, “I am kind regardless of differences,” is important because it brings up a great point in the phrase, “regardless of differences.” Are we only kind to those who agree with us? Who are the same as us? No, it is important to be kind to everyone, regardless of what they may do or think.
This does not mean that we let people walk all over us, or that we allow someone to hurt another person or ourselves. That is not kindness. What it does mean, is that we do not intentionally and with malice seek to hurt another person. We seek to understand them and what might have led them to where they are now and to the beliefs that they have. The following are 4 things that we can do to be kind to another person, even when they are different from us.
1: Let Go of Offense
Last week’s post was on letting go of offense. It walks you through the process of letting go of feelings such as anger, frustration and of being offended. It’s about creating a place where you can speak with another person, even disagreeing with them, while still seeking to understand, love, and respect one another. Letting go of offense helps us to remember that the views and perceptions of other people are not truly about us, but about the different experiences and thoughts that they are having. We can then allow ourselves to be free from others’ perceptions of us.
2: Seek First to Understand
The next thing that we can do to be kind to others is one of the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey. It is to “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” Just as with letting go of offense, this allows us to see things from another’s point of view rather than from assuming things about them. This is showing kindness because it is not about what you get out of the conversation but about getting to know the other person and caring about them. It is also a powerful tool for creating a place where we can connect one with another.
3: Seek to See the Good
The third way to be kind is to intentionally seek to see the good in others. Take a moment right now to write down a few people whom you want to see in a more positive light. Then think about what makes them unique and how those unique qualities are actually strengths. Write them down and as you write also think about other qualities or acts of kindness that you have seen them do.
When I served a mission for my church at the age of 21, I was paired up with someone who I really struggled with. It wasn’t until I intentionally took the time to stop and think about her positive qualities that I started to see her differently. I began to see how she impacted and inspired those around her. Yes, at times, we still struggled, but I began to love her for who she was and I am now so thankful for the time that I had with her and for the things that I learned from her.
4: Fulfill A Need
The fourth way we can be kind is to fulfill a need. That need may be letting them know you care by dropping off some cookies or sending some flowers. Writing a thank you note or sending them a message that expresses some of the positive traits that you have noticed in them can also feel an emotional need. Look for ways that you can help them like picking up something from the store for them or babysitting their kids. When we make an intentional effort to reach out to others in kind ways it helps us to feel more love for them.
Sometimes life gets the best of us, we feel worn down and tired. It can be hard to reach out with kindness towards another. But I know that as you keep trying, giving yourself grace when things don’t turn out the way you intended, or needing to recharge your emotional battery as needed, you’ll find that in time, you have more positive, loving thoughts towards others.
If you are wanting to gain more clarity on what holds you back from connecting with others and/or brainstorming how to break through the obstacles in your way, then I can help. You can work with me via Zoom. Schedule a free consulation today here.
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